anyone who tried to deny you must be out of their mind

maybe i am.

my capacity for loving people (or occasional lack thereof) will forever and ever be a mystery to me.

i hate that there must be casualties along the way. 

i know God's trying to get my attention. He's trying to tell me something. 

i'm listening. 

to change the world, you start with one step

i want to change the world.

i always thought that the people to change world would be those who have their own world together. then, they would somehow impose their 'perfect' world upon all of us, and viola! their way would automatically be better, and we would all have no choice but to trade our imperfect existance in for a glossy, sweet-smelling universe. there are a few people i have in mind when i think about this.

amanda peery.

annie carter.

brianna gaither.

cara blakemore.

then, i remember that they can't change the world. it's impossible and unrealistic to think that they can.

but they've changed mine.

i think that's enough.

see, it's not about doing big, big things.
dreaming impossible dreams.
solving impossible problems.
sharing impossible news.

it's about the little things.
like loving impossible people.
forgiving impossible shortcomings.
hoping for impossible outcomes.
possessing impossible joy.
patience.
peace.
grace.

it's all of these small, seemingly insignificant things that have the power to turn a bad day into a good day. a day without purpose into a day with assurance. they can give someone who feels as insignificant and invisible as a young shepherd boy the courage to defeat a giant. someone with a past as vulgar and dirty as her reputation as a prostitute now possess the honor and dignity of being listed in the family history of Jesus Christ Himself.

so, maybe one person can change the world. and has. by doing little, insignificant things, Jesus Christ offers us His world as an alternative to our own. He calls us each day to leave our own little comfortable, cozy, unbelievably corrupt worlds and join His. we have this choice each day. each day.

but how many times do we say to Christ,
"sorry, big guy. i really need this today. tomorrow, maybe."

or,

"i just can't change this about myself today. but keep those blessings coming."

or,

"i want Your world today, really i do. but i don't have the courage to fully take it on today. so instead of asking for it, i'll just hold on to the security blanket of mine."

or even,

"You couldn't possibly want me today. there's no way. i'll keep this guilt for myself today."

we must all make the decision daily to abandon our world and everything in it, and jump uninhibited into the universe of our Creator.

He's already changed the world.

is it good enough for you today?